


a common story about boys and the beach

by Piriluk (orphan_account)



Category: Vocaloid
Genre: F/M, Humor, Oneshot, Romance, Sexual Humor, Teen Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-17
Updated: 2015-11-17
Packaged: 2018-05-02 01:49:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,719
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5229290
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/Piriluk
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>And that's how Rin emerges from the bathroom a new woman fifteen minutes later, feeling violated and extremely uncomfortable, but ready to go kick some Miku-butt and possibly ogle at Len's V-line a little more. ONESHOT</p>
            </blockquote>





	a common story about boys and the beach

**Author's Note:**

> warning: this is puberty-esque, and makes several mentions towards periods, tampons, and Len's sexy V-line. offended? keep reading.

 

**A COMMON STORY ABOUT BOYS AND THE BEACH**

Rin doesn't understand boys.

Period. (Ha-ha, very funny.)

She doesn't understand how they seem to have this crazy obsession over  _cheerleaders_ , or have this great knowledge that if they put up a douche-front they'll seem cool, or why they all simultaneously seem to think Miku Hatsune is the bees' knees, when rather, she is just a giant snob.

She also fails to grasp the notion that because she may not wear high heels (thanks to her god-awful balance), lacks in womanly endorsements (B-cups are pretty impressive, though!) and dislikes makeup and dresses, they seem to have this ludicrous idea she isn't actually a female.

Or— _actually_ —when she acts like a female or has a female-related issue, they tease her about it like  _that isn't supposed to happen_.

Boys.  _Boys_.

They suck.

Rin's advice for today is that you  _shouldn't choose boys as your best friends_. Especially when they're misogynist and they are girl-crazy. It's like dealing with a penis you don't want. Literally (and figuratively).

The reason influencing this enraged recommendation is due to the events of today. Today, Rin was supposed to go over to Len's house to have a Star Wars movie marathon with Len and Kaito.

But no. What does she do when she gets over to Len's house? She hears about how  _Kaito got a text from Gakupo, who got a text from Luka, telling Gakupo that she and Miku and a couple other of their girlfriends would be going out to the beach_  and that  _now their plans have changed_ , for the sake of Len and Kaito, to go stalk Miku and her friends because they're wearing bikinis and that will give the two girlfriend-less losers something to jack off to for the rest of the week!

Rin solely promises to break Gakupo's phone later.

"So d'you wanna come?" Len asks, after reciting their new plans to her off a palm card.

"We were going to have a  _Star Wars movie marathon_ ," Rin says. "A  _Star Wars movie marathon_  I have been waiting AN ENTIRE WEEK FOR. But  _no!_  You guys have to go stalk Miku, because you're a bunch of pathetic creeps."

Len recoils, apparently not wanting believe Rin's very much correct opinion. "We can always do it next weekend, though. The beach is fun. Plus it's a nice day." He smiles nervously. "Right, Kaito?"

Kaito pokes his head around the door from the kitchen, a toothbrush in his mouth. A muffled, "Yes!" emits from his body.

" _I don't care_  if it's a nice day or not. You promised we'd watch Star Wars. I honestly don't understand what's so great about Miku and her gang in comparison to that," Rin argues, folding her arms over her chest.

Len and Kaito exchange amused looks. Oh great,  _here_  we go. "Boobs," Kaito says, grasping his chest. "Boobs everywhere." Slabs of fat with mammary glands, more like it.

"And nice, smooth legs," Len adds, hiking up his board shorts, exposing his pale, hairy, teenage-ry-boy thighs, while doing a circular motion towards them with his hand. Rin rolls her eyes up at the ceiling, having a feeling he's taking a prod at her own legs, which she hasn't touched with a shaver in over a week.

"Hot bodies," Kaito continues, doing an hourglass shape in the air. "In  _bikinis_." Probably only two percent of the female population have body shapes to that standard.

Len nods excitedly. " _Bikinis_ ," he hisses, "on cute girls." Rin narrows her eyes into a glare, clearly unimpressed.

Simultaneously, the duo throw their hands into the air and yell, "CUTE GIRLS AT THE BEACH!"

Rin makes a gagging noise. "You two are  _so_  sad. Have you ever thought about how  _I_  felt? Or is it just only about you two?" Not to mention, Rin's on her period… and she can't exactly touch a body of water in case the sharks might come. Oh, yeah—she tried tampons once, but it was like shoving a freaking cactus up there. Painful, and also mentally scarring.

The blonde-haired boy walks up to his friend and places an arm around her shoulders. She stiffens, but it goes unnoticed by her counterpart. "Of course, there will be hot, ripped men there, too, Rin," he tells her gently. "Unless you sway the other way." Kaito snickers.

Rin pushes Len away from her side, apparently disgusted. "Just because I'm not interested in smothering two layers of makeup on my face for the sake of pleasing the opposite gender doesn't mean I'm a lesbian," she states bitterly.

"I never said you were," Len answers smoothly, before turning away to shove his towel and stuff into the bag Kaito is holding out.

It takes two seconds for Rin to realise it's  _her_  bag. "Hey! What do you think you're doing?" she demands, snatching her bag back and digging through it to see God knows what else they put in there. "I never said I was—"

Kaito places his hands on both Rin and Len's shoulders, halting Rin mid-sentence, before spinning them around and pushing them in the direction for the door. "They're meeting up at 12 and it's already 11:30, so let's argue in the car on the way there!" he exclaims goofily.

Rin huffs angrily as she's forced into the back of the car. Kaito hops into the driver's seat and Len sits in the passenger's seat—oh, but she has to sit in the back by herself. Not fair. "I hate you both," she comments. And she means it wholeheartedly. After today, she is  _done._  She's going to go find better, less-Miku-crazed friends who will actually bother watching Star Wars with her, and ditch these two douchefaces.

"You won't be saying that when you pick up a hot surfer dude, Rinnie," Kaito says, turning back to wink at her. She frowns at the nickname and turns away to stare in an angry-silence out the window.

She actually hates everyone.

* * *

The beach is bright. And hot. And smells of salt. And there's no sight of any cute guys,  _anywhere_. Rin considers staying back in the car, but then she might die from heatstroke, so, no.

Reluctantly she follows the duo across the simmering sand, embarrassed to be the only one dressed in regular clothing, and watches as Kaito's hawk-eye spots the infamous teal pigtails playing in the water with a small group of familiar other girls. Gakupo is sitting under a large beach umbrella next to Luka, somewhat making out, and Rin suddenly regrets ever waking up today.

There's an age-old rivalry going on between Miku and Rin—God knows why, but Miku despises her existence and it always seems to end up in some stupid bitch fight somehow. Rin doesn't like Miku's raunchy and self-obsessed attitude, and Miku doesn't like… Rin. In general.

So of course, it only sinks in then how much a bad idea this whole thing is.

She drops back a little, considering maybe walking to the bus stop and taking a bus back home, but Len has her bag which has her purse  _which has her bus pass_ , so this situation is very much not under her control. Rin says her prayers, expecting Miku to bite her face off, and sidles up closer behind Len and Kaito.

Unfortunately so, Len and Kaito are not very good methods of protection for Rin—they're Miku-obsessed, so they wouldn't try protecting Rin from Miku because they'd be too busy trying to catch Miku's attention, and plus, they seem to think this universally-decided conflict between the two is  _funny_. Somewhat friends they are, right?

The group settle under the beach umbrella set up next to Gakupo and Luka, who thankfully stop dry-humping each other to greet everyone else. Luka seems surprised by Rin's presence—as is Rin surprised for letting herself so easily be dragged into this situation.

"Rin!" she exclaims. "I thought you wouldn't be interested in coming." Unlike Miku, Luka is nice, and is actually kind to everyone.

Rin sighs. "If I had it my way, I wouldn't have," she explains dryly, narrowing her eyes at Kaito and Len, who are fist-bumping Gakupo and getting an eyeball of Miku and her C-cups.

Luka pouts in sympathy, patting her on the shoulder. "I still don't understand how you can stand those two," she says. Rin rolls her eyes, mentally answering,  _me neither_. "They're like the embodiment of raging testosterone. Look how pathetically excited they are to take off their shirts and reveal their puny abs." She nods over at the two, and Rin follows her gaze.

She feels her mouth drop open slightly _. Good God_. Since when did  _Len_  have muscles? It certainly doesn't show otherwise. He even has a V-line. A  _V-line_. Only Bonds models achieve such beautiful looks. It's a blessing to actually find a guy with a V-line.

Rin realises she's been staring a little bit too long, and snaps her mouth shut, flushing. "Um, yeah," she answers belatedly, and Luka gives her a weird look.

"So, how did your date with Piko go?" she then asks.

Rin blinks, temporarily forgetting this person called  _Piko_. "Oh, last week?" she inquires, remembering the short, white-haired boy she went out to the movies with last Sunday. Luka nods, her eyes flickering past Rin's head momentarily. "It was okay. He was kind of shy and awkward, so he hardly said anything. It felt a little bit like going on a date with a brick wall." Luka snorts.

"A date? You went on a date?" Rin glances over her shoulder to see Len rubbing sunscreen over his shoulders, looking at her with a confused expression on her face.

She raises her eyebrows. "Yeah? Why so surprised?"

Len shrugs. "You didn't say anything, that's all."

"I didn't really find the need to tell you, considering you'd probably make a misogynistic joke out of it," Rin clarifies matter-of-factly. She puts on a mock-male voice. " _Oh, you're going on a date? Since when did a guy ever want to date you?_ " The two girls then titter between themselves.

The blonde boy scoffs, but doesn't deny it, and holds out the sunblock to Rin. "Can you rub it on my back, please?"

She screws up her nose, taking the bottle, and he turns away. "You have pimples," she states, slathering a layer of the oily liquid onto his skin. He doesn't  _really_ —a few here and there, but…

"Like  _you_  can say anything," Len shoots back over his shoulder.

Rin slaps him on his side. "At least I bathe twice a day and it's not from unhygienic practices," she defends.

Len throws back his head and laughs. "Are you trying to say I don't  _shower?_ " She pretends to sniff his back and forces a gagging-sound, and he just rolls his eyes. "I wash twice a day, too, thank you very much."

"Ha," Rin says. She glibly slaps the middle of his back three times. "All done, Mr  _I Wash Twice A Day_."

The boy stands and takes the sunscreen from her hands, grinning. "You're welcome, Miss  _It's Not From Unhygienic Practices_." He dodges Rin's leg as she tries to side swipe him and gallops out from under the umbrella, turning back to pull a face. Then he runs off to join Kaito and Miku.

Rin sighs, turning back to Luka. She has an eyebrow raised. "Flirting, I see?"

The blonde-haired girl snorts in disagreement, throwing her head back. "Psh,  _flirting?_ " she says, "With  _Len?_  Ew."

Luka squints her eyes, smirking. "You two would make a cute couple," she states.

"No way," Rin denies, waving her hands around frantically in a  _no-no_  gesture. "More like get us arrested—have you seen how many times old people have mistaken us for siblings? It's embarrassing. Who would want to be related to him?" She glances back at the boy who's splashing water at Miku, having the time of his life gazing at her C-cups.

"You?" Luka says, and Rin pushes her over. She laughs at Rin's flustered reaction and picks up her book. "Y'know, if you really want him to notice you, you've got to make him realise you're actually a  _girl_ , Rin."

Rin opens her mouth to rebut, but closes it on realising Luka is… correct. About making him realise she's a female—that's all. She shoots a glare at the pink-haired girl, but she just smiles over her book and goes back to reading; very aware about how right she is.

But how… would Rin do that? Len and Kaito are  _adamant_  the third musketeer (they deem her) is one of their own—and lacks all sexual appeal that a female should have accordingly. Len isn't minutely interested in a girl who doesn't dress in short skirts and crop-tops and waves pompoms around, let alone…  _her._

Oh God, what is she saying? Talk about letting Luka get into her head.

She huffs as she watches Miku jump around in her skimpy outfit, allowing both Kaito and Len's eyes pop out of their heads.  _Perverts_ , she thinks, turning her attention to her phone to aid her boredom.  _They're so desperate._

* * *

After a while, Len comes back up to scull down some water. He flops down onto the sand beside Rin, dripping wet, panting. (That sounded unintentionally sexual.) "You really outta come and join us, Rin," he says, nudging her to gain her attention from her phone. "The water's really nice."

"Uh-huh," she says uninterestedly, not glancing up from the screen. "In this outfit? I don't think so." She gestures to her t-shirt and short-shorts, and Len cocks an eyebrow at her.

"So? You can just take them off," he tells her.

Rin looks up from her phone screen to blow in the boy's face. "Ha-ha, very funny," she replies. "There's no way I'm going out their skinny-dipping with you two sad souls."

Len blushes. "I-I meant you could just take off your shirt. I wasn't requesting your underwear off, too," he stutters, apparently ill at ease.

She smirks. "What, so you can compare my boob size to Miku's? We've already established they're smaller than hers a month ago, Len. How about we compare your dick size to Kaito's? Or Gakupo's?"

"No way in hell you will," Luka says assertively over her book.

Rin laughs.

"Well, you don't have to  _swim_. You could come down and walk in the water where it doesn't reach your thighs," Len suggests. "I kind of feel bad leaving you up here with your phone and book-face over here."

Luka makes a noise, and Rin looks back at her. Luka raises an eyebrow and nods her head beckoningly, as if saying,  _he's right, you should go down there_. Rin runs her tongue across her teeth in thought. "You  _do_  know that Miku's going to cut me if I get down there in the same body of water as her."

Len shrugs. "So?"

Rin inhales, contemplating. "So…" She pauses for dramatic effect. "No."

The blonde boy frowns and exhales exasperatedly, putting his hands behind his head to stretch. "Fine then," he says, jumping up. "Have fun by yourself, Rinnie." He waves his fingers over his shoulder and pokes out his tongue. She rolls her eyes.

"I literally think he wanted you to go," Luka comments once he's out of earshot.

Rin rests her head on her knees. "I'm not risking getting my head bitten off by Miku. I'm not in the mood for it."

"Who cares about Miku? Guys love it when girls get all feisty. You know she's only jealous because you're biffles with Kaito," she answers offhandedly.

"Wait, what?" Rin swerves around on her butt to look at Luka—or well, the book that is Luka. "You're not telling me Miku actually  _likes_  Kaito?" Luka nods. "Oh God, if he knew that, he would probably jizz himself."

"He would," Gakupo agrees, and it's the first time Rin's noticed he'd been sitting there in the last half-an-hour.

The trio snicker, before Rin throws her phone aside into her bag and stands. Very well, then.

She brushes the sand off her shorts and turns to Luka nervously, sucking in a breath. "Luka," she addresses in a very even tone. "Do you happen to have a tampon I could borrow?" This is killing Rin's pride.

Luka looks up, somewhat surprised by the question. "Um, sure, in the side pocket of my bag." She doesn't even bat an eyelid about it, though.

Relieved, Rin kisses the pink-haired girl's head. " _Thank_  you," she says, " _so_  much."

And that's how Rin emerges from the bathroom a new woman fifteen minutes later, feeling violated and extremely uncomfortable, but ready to go kick some Miku-butt and possibly ogle at Len's V-line a little more.

After lathering six layers of sunscreen onto her body and getting confused glances from Gakupo, she sets off across the burning sand towards the group playing in the ocean, smoothing her hair down and trying to not look like she has a cotton stick shoved up her hoo-ha.

Len notices her approaching and smiles widely, waving his hand in the air at her. "It's Rinnie!" he announces, and both Kaito, Miku and a few others turn their heads to stare at her. A couple of people probably didn't even know Rin existed until today.

"She's emerged from her socially-isolating shell to join us in fun?! What a shocker," Kaito says and Rin just pulls a face, ignoring Miku shooting daggers at her from over his shoulder.

Len bounds over to Rin to greet her, reminding her of a golden retriever. "Why the change of heart?" he asks, grinning.

_Luka gave me a tampon and I found out Miku has a huge crush on ice-cream-brain over here_ , she answers mentally. "I felt bad seeing how disappointed you were," Rin jests, poking the boy in the ribs.

He jumps away, laughing, but closes in to poke her several times back. Rin flinches, apparently ticklish, and Len notices, a smirk stretching across his lips.  _Oh no_ , Rin thinks, and the teenage boy launches himself at her, slithering his fingers up her sides and under her armpits.

Little does he know Rin is secretly a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle and starts breaking out in karate moves, almost hitting him in the face. Eventually she manages to wriggle free from his hands, giggling, and twists around, shoving him down into the wet sand.

"Oh really?" Len says, standing up and stepping towards Rin. She takes a step backwards. "You wanna play at  _that_  game?"

Swiftly, the teenage boy grabs her by the hips and hauls her over his shoulder, running into the water. " _Nooooo!_ " Rin cries, and he strides into the waist-deep water, swinging her back down so she's sitting bridal-style in his arms.

At that moment, Len goes to say something and turns his head, before noticing their faces are extremely close, catching him off-guard. Rin stops breathing, looking into his eyes, and they stare at each other in a tension-filled silence before—

Len throws her into the ocean as a sacrifice to the sharks.

After a few moments of sinking, she pushes her feet against the sand and breaks the surface for air to hear Kaito yelling, "You ruined it!" She looks at Len who has his head back laughing, and Kaito gestures to Rin. "Look how devastated she is!"

Rin pushes her hair out of her face and laughs as well, but she has to admit she is a little disappointed in Len's actions.

…Well,  _a lot_ , actually. They were staring into each other's eyes all dramatically like they do in movies, and she thought he was actually going to kiss her. But he didn't—he threw her into the water and made her only change of clothes wet. Such romantic. Much love. Wow.

"Now my clothes are soaking, you asshole," she says to Len, flicking water at him while wading past. However, she feels an arm snake around her hips and she's pulled back against Len's body. Rin blinks, confused, before tilting her head backwards to see his face. He pokes out his tongue at her and grins, before swerving her around to face him.

"But guess what?" Len leans down to her ear to whisper, "I still made you wet."

Rin pulls back as a blush breaks across her cheeks, mortified, and he winks. "What'd he say?" Kaito demands from behind them.

Len splashes water in his direction, making the blue-haired boy swim away evasively. "None of your business. Now please turn away while I deal with this  _lady_." Kaito snorts, but obeys, turning to face Miku, who is gawking at the sight before her eyes.

"Now, where were we?" he asks Rin in a mock-French accent, wiggling his eyebrows somewhat suggestively.

Rin shrugs and smiles, pretending to be oblivious towards his stupid act. "You were flirting with me and…?" She trails off and looks up at Len expectantly.

"Ah yes, now I remember." The corners of his lips twitch as he tilts down his head. He lifts his hand to her forehead and—"In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit—"

He starts  _blessing_ her.  _Of all things_.

Rin just rolls her eyes and grabs the back of his head, murmuring, "For fuck's sake, Len," before cramming his lips against hers, cutting him off mid-sentence. Rin has never, at that time, wanted to stab a boy from frustration so badly in her life.

Above all, maybe Rin is a little glad she did end up going to the beach.

They break apart to breathe, and Len attempts to give Rin a sexy look by tilting his head and looking up from under his eyelashes, but instead he ends up looking more so constipated, if anything. She ends up snorting and pushing his face away. "I've never met someone who could put off kissing another person so much in my life," Rin points out.

"Rinnie, I highly doubt you've kissed anyone else  _but_  me," Len responds, pulling her back up against him.

Rin smiles, resting her head against his chest. "You know that guy Piko?"

Len hums in response, apparently not very enthused.

"I was never actually interested in him anyway. I just wanted to make you jealous."

END

**Author's Note:**

> a reprint from my ffnet. i havent gone through and checked for mistakes. haha oops.


End file.
